Added: Domanique Pruitt - Date: 08.03.2022 02:50 - Views: 19478 - Clicks: 9558
Yesterday, to celebrate Memorial Day, I played golf. I shot a 40 on the front nine at Tenison Highlands. Pretty good little start to the day. But after that, everything went to hell. But Bark is a Marine Corps vet. After my round, I went back to the house and threw out my back while cleaning my gutters.
Plus, I had a reaction, I think, to all the catkins in the gutters and started feeling sick.
Then, while my wife went to have dinner with a bunch of our friends, I had to stay home and watch The Real Housewives of Dallas. Stephanie and Brandi are going to scout party locations, and Travis encourages his wife to enlist the help of his personal assistant, Courtney.
Cut to the Deuber surgical center, where we see Mark and Cary wrapping up a boob job. A patient lies unconscious on the operating table, her breasts looking like two halves of a Nerf football. They are only slightly blurred out.
You can see the sutures and everything as Cary wipes them down. To The Mitchell we go. Somehow this makes me feel violated, like watching security-camera footage of a burglar in your own house. Stephanie laughs that irritating laugh.
Nothing happens. LeeAnne talks about the keynote she will deliver at a luncheon for the Grace Projecta conference for women who are HIV positive. Back to The Mitchell. Back to LeeAnne and Rich eating lunch. LeeAnne says something about being tired of fighting with everyone. I kind of zone out as the show goes to commercial break. What the heck is happening to me? Normally I sit down on Monday nights to watch this show with a heavy heart.
I watch the show listlessly, with little interest. But then something really stupid will happen, and it will shake me from my stupor. Last night, I make it to the first commercial break without seeing anything like that. After commercials, we go to a conference room at the Westin, where LeeAnne delivers her keynote to the women who are HIV positive. I felt her connection with these women.
And I also saw these women embrace who they are and their circumstance because of her. It was really cool. At this point, my wife comes home from dinner and puts on the Warriors-Thunder game in the other room, just to taunt me. No way could she name more than three players from both teams combined.
Prediction: she will deny this on Facebook and, in so doing, get back at me with a better joke than my Splash Brothers joke. Travis tells his boys that for his birthday he hopes Mommy will jump out of a cake wearing a bikini. I would like to give Travis a label. She gets a call from Stephanie, who relays the poo-poo story in all its hilarity. But not to worry. He suggests that she pop out of a cake topless and sing him happy birthday. I love you. I feel like you treat me like. Travis might be a meathead and a sexist and a bad example to his boys, but I feel for him.
They hang up without setting a place or time to meet. Cut to the Deuber house. Zuri has birthday cake and opens presents. But I feel compelled to point out that every time they use a shot of the Trinity River, it is flooded. They got a few shots back whenever they taped the show, and they just keep reusing the same four or five. I imagine a first-time visitor to our fair city, a Real Housewives fan. I know I have that side of me. Me, for example. I can be a nice guy. I can also be a jerk. But it is who I am. If anyone would like me to keynote their meeting, I can be had for a very reasonable honorarium.
My own observation is that during this lunch scene, Brandi has two different looks in her confessional. Cut to WhatchamaCallit Boutiquewhich has the most irritating camel-capped name in Dallas. Am I wrong about this? Are you serious? We get a quick scene with Brandi and her 4-year-old daughter, Brinkley, eating lunch at their kitchen counter. Brandi asks Brinkley if she likes boys. She says that she does not. Brandi asks how boys and girls are different. Brinkley says that boys have tails.
No judgment. Every parent has been there. My year-old son still thinks Mommy lost her tail because she was running with scissors. I may be poop-your-pants nervous. Not quite. Mark points out that his shoes came from Florence. Stephanie says she hopes the party will be fun and drama free. Steph Curry has the best three-shot stretch of his career.
At The Mitchell, Stephanie and Brandi do tequila shots as they wait for guests to arrive. Oh, we think, this is going to be a train wreck. Shoes are coming off. Efrog best watch out! You know what happens, though? I almost feel bad for the Bravo editors, they have so little to work with. Everyone just tells everyone else that she looks gorgeous.
Oh, they get plenty drunk. But instead of fighting, Brandi and LeeAnne bond over bathroom humor. Just beware. Travis hugs Bryan. Perhaps because they felt bad about the show having no ending, the Bravo editors threw in one final scene. Post party at the Hollman house, Stephanie does acquiesce and pop out of a cake for Travis. It is not a poo-poo cake. Browse all newsletters here. Cary Deuber wants to show you her fillings. The art in the Deuber house had to be blurred because Bravo knows that kids could be watching.
Quick, get the kids so they can see Mommy jump out of a cake while wearing her panties. Related Content. D-Town Throwdown D Magazine.
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